by Mike Ososki, PMP

Yin-YangOriginating in Chinese philosophy, yin-yang represents two opposite yet complementary forces that exist in everything, interdependent and striving for dynamic balance and harmony.

These elements were woven throughout Gloriana Teh’s recent presentation, Paradoxical Leadership: The Project Manager’s Edge. We all know to “think outside the box,” and Gloriana suggests that we build a bigger box. Rather than being stuck in either/or thinking, shift to the healthier both/and perspective.

Both-AndMany existing leadership models tend to be too complicated and/or not sufficiently robust. We struggle to navigate conflict and manage seemingly contradictory yet interconnected behaviors. Using the both/and approach, we can better see both sides are valid, and depend on specific context.

Good project managers have many tools in their belt. They know how to select and apply the best ones as needed to get the job done. Project-wise, we may use both Agile and Waterfall, Always important is to consider whether a decision is reversible (pencil) vs. irreversible (pen). It is a hybrid world, and we do well to adapt and adopt.

LEGO has an excellent collection of paradox examples:

LEGO

The Paradox Principle: An unresolved paradox is a source of tension and conflict. A well-managed paradox generates alignment and forward momentum. Think of a slingshot, which has great tension until released.

With problems, we have symptoms. Use paradox to get to the root cause, which is often conflicting values. Watch out for “out of balance paradoxes.” Harrison Paradox Theory states that, when combined with stress, we can ‘flip’ to the opposite of our normal behavior, causing conflict.

Excellence = Quality x Acceptance, difficult to balance between, and hard to achieve. Acceptance directly ties into Change Management, an increasingly needed skill for PMs. Consider Prosci’s ADKAR framework ...

Awareness > Desire > Knowledge > Ability > Reinforcement.

EmpathyEmotional Intelligence (EQ) is the most important factor to predict success for leaders. Research shows it to be twice as important as IQ or technical skills. For senior leaders, 90% of the difference between star performers and average performers can be attributed to EQ factors, and people who have high EQ earn $29k more per year. Consider Daniel Goleman’s 4 quadrants, incorporating a double paradox!

Know the steps to build your EQ:

1. Build self-awareness.

2. Increase self-regulation and build social awareness.

3. Build social skills and improve relationship management.

... and always surround the entire process with empathy.

image-29Psychological safety is critical for teams to achieve excellence. It sources from the belief that we will not be punished or humiliated for speaking up with ideas, questions, concerns, or mistakes. It does not mean the absence of conflict, but that it’s handled in a healthy, respectful way. The best group norm is to trust others and be open and vulnerable.

Spot paradoxes in everyday situations, especially when conflict arises. Use these assessments with your team ...

Know your unique paradoxes and true strengths.

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After years of corporate management and process development work, Gloriana Teh changed her career path to one of independent consulting and people development. See more here ... https://www.claritasconsultcoach.com.